I had patients yesterday who, every time they come in, things are always “bad”. It’s not their health –physically, they have very little wrong with them. They see me because I make a difference for their stress and anxiety. But it’s always interesting to me how they answer my question “How are things going?” because it’s never good.

These patients fall into my category of “Overthinkers” – people who spend WAY too much time worrying, analyzing, thinking, leading them to find something wrong, or at least not working, in everything. Isn’t that how our brains are trained? They’re not trained to be looking at the glass half-full – we’re trained to see where we’re not enough, or how I screwed up making dinner, or that I don’t have enough money compared to so-and-so. This became immediately apparent when I had them do this exercise:

I asked them to name 4 things they were grateful for, big or small. It was easy for them to get two – they both said “Family” and then another one. But then both of them got stuck. One of them I kept prompting, and she finally got to four, but the other one simply couldn’t. I pointed out that to one that he’s probably grateful for his dog, and also for his musical talent, and he immediately said, “Yeah, but…” and I cut him off right there. That’s more of the same – we might see something “good” and then immediately it’s not enough.

I sent them home with this exercise – which they had to write down either four or five things every day they were grateful for. I had to practice this when I first started (the obvious ones of family are there), but then I started seeing it everywhere – I’m grateful my hairdresser makes me look good! I’m grateful for my laptop, the internet, rolling suitcases, Amazon, Google, cell phones, my brilliant office manager, living in Austin, my great relationships with people, that I can ride a bike, I know how to heal myself, that I live in the US, that it’s finally raining here – you get the picture. You can really go on and on, once you get it.

So you try it – what are four things you’re grateful for?

Postscript: After I wrote this post, one of these patients came in, and he had been practicing this for some time at this point. And I was nearly in tears when I asked him to name 4 things he was grateful for, and he rattled off four with no trouble. So I asked for another four – and he rattled off another four. And I was on the list ☺  But it was amazing to see how much his attitude had changed – I was so moved.